Today: How does executive presence in the virtual world differ from the physical world? How do you ensure you are perceived as a leader? Find out how executive presence works and what it means for you.

Your turn: We'd love to hear from you. Use the "Message" button on the Anchor app to share a story, question, or feedback related to this episode. Or email us at joe@connectioncounselor.com

Learn more: Details about the book, online course, YouTube tutorials and more can be found at www.connectioncounselor.com/executive-presence-place

Music: Earning Happiness by John Bartmann is licensed under a CC0 1.0 Universal License

Transcript

What a crazy year it's been, right, with everything that's going on with COVID and for folks who are fortunate enough to be able to still work from home, it's been a year filled with lots of virtual meetings, right?

So you may have come from an environment where you're really good at navigating in the room and figuring out what you need to do - shaking hands, making alliances, talking to people, getting new ideas, whatever it is you do in that physical space. Maybe that was something you had figured out.

And then all of a sudden the rug is pulled out from underneath your feet. And we're in this brave, new virtual world. The world of back-to-back meetings, the world of Zoom fatigue, the world of do I really have to have my camera on all the time, and the world of worrying what's in your background or someone coming into your background or for some unfortunate people forgetting to wear their pants, in their virtual meeting.

But seriously, I get a question a lot. How can you have executive presence in a virtual setting, right? You're on this tiny little screen, basically compared to being there in person, uh, your screen may or may not be on; other people may or may not be looking at you. The audio is different. Your ability to make eye contact is different, or even just to nudge someone next to you or to whisper or, you know, give someone a hint.

All those things have kind of either been stripped away or have been replaced by new ways of doing that. So it can be very difficult for people to understand how to generate executive presence in a virtual environment - especially if you had it nailed in the physical environment - it can be quite a challenge.

And some people may say, we can't, and we just have to go back to the physical space. And what I like to tell people is that's not entirely true. They're not the same. But, if you look at the same principles and leverage the principles in the context of the new environment, there are definitely things you can do to improve your executive presence in a virtual setting.

So today I'm going to share with you one thing. For me, it's the most powerful thing you can do to generate executive presence in the virtual meeting. And I sum it up with a question, right? Ask yourself for any virtual meeting you're in, "what is the goal of the meeting and how can I help advance the goal?"

Think about that for a second. There's a reason people are having the meeting and whoever scheduled the meeting and the people who are attending want that goal to be advanced. So if you are on the call and you're just sitting back and you're passive or just reactive, and you're not really doing things to help advance the goal, or you're waiting to be asked, and then you're just responding, you're not really doing it yourself, you will be less likely to be perceived as having executive presence.

Versus the person who figures that out and doesn't wait to be asked, but starts to do the things that generate advancing the goal. Now, what if there is no goal to the meeting? Well, then you have a problem because it's hard to show executive presence to advance a goal when there is no goal.

So one of the things you can do in that situation is you can point that out, right? And you can be the person who says, wait a second, this meeting is not a productive use of anyone's time and offer alternate suggestions. Now, I understand what some of you may be thinking, whoa, career suicide, Joe. I am not going to do that. I am not in a position to make that call. And, that's totally right and I totally get that.

However, that doesn't mean you have to sit by passively and do nothing. What you can do in that situation is, if you don't have as much power or you don't feel as bold or comfortable doing that, you can ask questions to clarify that.

So you get clarification and get the people who do have the power thinking about it. So for instance, you could say, it's not entirely clear to me why we're here. I just want to make sure I can contribute to the best. Can you remind me again? What is the one major thing we want to accomplish coming out of this meeting?

So that's a clarifying question. Just by asking that question, you will be perceived as someone whose spirit and intention is to advance the goals and that will inform how people feel about your executive presence.

Another alternative in the same vein is you can make a suggestion and ask for others to weigh in. So you can say something like, maybe could we spend the next minute just getting input from everyone as to what the number one goal is or what the one thing we want to advance on this call is 'cause that would really help me clarify things and contribute better. So ask that question, then have others weigh in.

You don't always have to solve the question yourself to advance the goal. However, by doing that, you at the end of the call, will always be appreciated by the person who created the call, as well as the other people who are on the call, who frankly don't really want to waste their time on a call that has no point or no goal.

So think about that question. What is the goal of the meeting and how can I advance that goal to create outsized executive presence, even in a virtual setting. This is Joe Kwon, the Connection counselor. Thank you for listening to Executive Presence Morsels. Remember, it's not what you say do or wear, it's how you make people feel that generates executive presence. Nothing else matters.

Today: Do you have to be a certain age before you can wield executive presence? Let's consider. Find out how executive presence works and what it means for you. Thanks to Carlos Santiago from GSK for his insights, which contributed to this episode.

Your turn: We'd love to hear from you. Use the "Message" button on the Anchor app to share a story, question, or feedback related to this episode. Or email us at joe@connectioncounselor.com

Learn more: Details about the book, online course, YouTube tutorials and more can be found at www.connectioncounselor.com/executive-presence-place

Music: Earning Happiness by John Bartmann is licensed under a CC0 1.0 Universal License

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Transcript

Let's talk a little bit about age and executive presence. It's pretty easy to slip into the thinking that you need a certain amount of experience or a title, or need to reach a certain amount of, I don't know, grayness or white haired-ness to really warrant executive presence.

And I'm here to tell you that's totally bogus, right? That's not what executive is about, and I'm actually reminded of a really funny remark and insightful remark by Carlos Santiago, who's an executive for Glaxo Smith Kline; was interviewing him for a show, "Si-suite: A Seat at the Table With Executive Leaders" for a podcast that I host for ALPFA New Jersey. ALPFA's the Association of Latino professionals For America and I'm on the board of the New Jersey chapter.

And Carlos was talking about leadership development and he said a lot of times what you hear from people when you ask them for input on how you can develop as a leader, you hear a lot of things like, well, you need to be three to five years in every role, right?

And he thought about that and he was like, wait a second. What is the average age of most CEOs? They're roughly 40'ish and if every CEO actually had to take three to five years in each role before they became a CEO, as Carlos said, most CEOs will be closer to a hundred years old. So what's going on? What's what's different. Why is that advice actually not 100% valid?

And what's interesting to me is people can only see what they experienced and what they realize, and they kind of have a certain perspective and that understandably is what they're going to share with you. And I believe in most cases, that's a well-intentioned sharing. I don't think anyone was talking to Carlos trying to sabotage his career.

However, that doesn't mean that you always have to take as 100% truth, advice that people give to you. You have to consider why they're saying it and what's important and truthful about it, but it doesn't mean you have to limit yourself or assume that that is necessarily true, where the path for you as well.

And this also applies to executive presence. If we look back on our North Star, which is the definition of executive presence, which I've developed, which is, "executive presence is the ability to inspire confidence that you can lead well in a given situation."

Think about that for a second. There's no experience requirement there. There's no age requirement. There's no looks or title requirement. There's not even a talent or skills requirement. If, with all the tools you have at your disposal, you can inspire confidence in that particular person that you are the best one to lead in a given situation, you will be the one who's perceived as having executive precedence.

So it doesn't matter if you're 5, 15, 20, 25 or 55. If you are able to do that, you will be perceived as having executive presence. So the question is not really, when will I have executive presence? It's how do I generate executive presence now?

So whether you're a student, whether you have just entered the workforce or whether you're a seasoned professional that maybe has been critiqued that they don't have executive presence, if you start thinking about executive presence in these terms, you'll start to understand and be able to develop the right things - the things that actually generate executive presence and put to the side parts of advice that don't really get to the root, which is how to generate executive presence. Not when.

I'd love to hear from you about how you're enjoying executive presence morsels. Feel free to record a message on the anchor.fm app or website with your thoughts or questions on executive presence. I'd love to hear from you.

This is Joe Kwon, the Connection Counselor, and thank you for listening to Executive Presence Morsels. Remember, it's not what you say, do or wear, it's how you make people feel that generates executive presence. Nothing else matters.

Today: It's not enough to just have executive presence. We explore what it can and cannot do for you. Find out how executive presence works and what it means for you.

Your turn: We'd love to hear from you. Use the "Message" button on the Anchor app to share a story, question, or feedback related to this episode. Or email us at joe@connectioncounselor.com

Learn more: Details about the book, online course, YouTube tutorials and more can be found at www.connectioncounselor.com/executive-presence-place

Music: Earning Happiness by John Bartmann is licensed under a CC0 1.0 Universal License

Transcript

So we've been talking a lot about executive presence and all the advantages, it confers, and some of the reasons why you'd really, it would really be good to have it for your career and your personal results. Well, today I want to talk about the limits of executive presence, right? It's not a magical quality that's the only thing you need to be successful. However, I want to very specifically address what some of the limits are and maybe what some of the myths are about what executive presence is and what it can and cannot do.

So executive presence and having executive presence, let's just assume, imagine yourself as having all the executive presence that you're ever going to have and it's awesome. People are just like, wow, you have amazing executive presence. That's the good news. The bad news is executive presence is not the same thing as being skilled in your area, and it's not the same as being an effective leader, right? Just because you have executive presence doesn't mean you're going to be effective as a leader. And it also doesn't mean that you're the best choice for the job.

So you may be wondering, Joe, what are you talking about, right? Everywhere I read, they say executive presence, or you even say executive presence sets the altitude for your career. Why are you downplaying executive presence now?

So to explain the nuance here, remember, executive presence is about how people feel about you, right?

And it's a very specific feeling. It's the feeling about how well you can lead in a given situation. So think about that for a second. The fact that you feel someone can lead well in a given situation is not exactly the same thing as them having the skills needed to lead. You believe they do. You probably believe they do, right? You'd be foolish to think that they'd have executive presence if they don't, but it's not the same thing.

Also, being an effective leader, which requires more than people just following what you do or feeling that they should follow what you do. There's a lot more to being an effective leader than just that.

So again, executive presence doesn't necessarily give you that as well.

And finally, and I think this one is the most important one and certainly one for upper management to consider if you're part of upper management. It does not mean that you or the person that you select, based on great executive presence is the best choice for the job. All it means is that you feel like they'd be the best choice for the job.

So what's the problem here? The problem is sometimes the person you feel is the best is actually not the best. They could just be the person who's the best at convincing everyone that they should feel that they're the best. They may not have the skills. They may not have the experience. They might not even have the right temperament or strategy or discipline to execute the job that you need executed.

And the North star, I think always for management, is what is the job that needs to get done and why. Not, who's the best person to pick, right? It's always about what is the eventual end goal for the organization for society, whatever your particular North star is. That's, what's guiding it, right?

It's not a personality thing or a personal thing. It's about what is the most effective way to go.

So all this, just to say, executive presence is one aspect and it's a very important aspect because if people don't feel that about you, it won't matter that you have the skill. It won't matter that you are effective or that you are the best choice for the job. If you don't have executive presence, it makes it much less likely that you will be recognized to fulfill your potential or that you will be selected for great opportunities. By the same token, just because you have executive presence, you don't necessarily assume that you have all those other things it takes as well.

So it's always important to have a realistic assessment of your skills and your gaps, and to get feedback from people and to consider all those things. So just because people are telling you you're great and they feel you're great, does not mean that there aren't other areas where you can and need to improve.

It's been great talking to you again. Would love it if you have any comments or questions on executive presence or reactions to any of these episodes, please record a message on Anchor.fm. I'd love to hear from you. Thanks for listening to Executive Presence Morsels. This is Joe Kwon, the Connection Counselor. Remember, it's not what you say, do or wear, it's, how you make people feel that generates executive presence. Nothing else matters.