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If the last year has taught us anything, it’s that maintaining connections with others over distance can be challenging. Many of us — despite being outgoing or having the best intentions — struggle to maintain connections even when we’re free to come and go as we please. It’s easy to forget to check in on good friends, make plans and forget to follow up, and so on. And with the added complication of forced distance, such as what which we’ve all experienced for the past year, it can be even harder to set aside and organize time to connect.
The good news is that with conditions improving, there’s the hope of less social distance in the months and year ahead. Regardless of how and when we can ease up on precautions though, we’ve learned the value of developing fun and reliable ways to connect over distance. So, whether for the next few months under the pandemic or the future thereafter, I thought it would be useful to point to a few of the effective solutions I’ve come across in the past year.
Video Chats
It’s no exaggeration to say that video chats have become a vital part of modern society. This is why, in light of the pandemic, the importance of virtual executive presence has become a common discussion point on this very site. But beyond its significance in the professional arena, video chat is also crucial to maintaining relationships over distance. In case you are wondering, yes, I’ve experienced Zoom fatigue like the rest of you. I find myself turning the video camera on less that I did earlier in the pandemic. Still, moving forward, tools like Zoom and Skype will still be very useful for those looking to connect over distance.
Watch Parties
For me personally, one of the real revelations of the pandemic has been the remote watch party. This is basically just what it sounds like: multiple people in different locations tuning in to watch shows and films at the same time. In some cases, streaming platforms even place chat windows beside viewing screens, so that people can talk to friends and family while watching. It can be a novel and flexible way to connect such that is something worth doing both with friends and relatives, and has value even when we’re completely clear of the pandemic. The ability to watch a film online while chatting with college friends dotted all around the country is, for me, a wonderful treat and a fun way to stay in touch.
Book Club Email Chains
I realize the book club thing isn’t for everyone, and frankly I don’t think it’s likely to be sustainable in a group that isn’t already fond of reading. In other words, if you look to start a remote book club with a few friends or family members who need to be persuaded to read for pleasure… well, I wish you luck! But as a regular reader with a few friends who are fellow book nerds, I find this can be another good way to maintain some social connection amidst isolation. Consider a group started late last summer in a very informal way — just exchanging thoughts and recaps in an email chain and keeping pace with each other — and having a lot of fun. (Some great books so far are “The Splendid And The Vile” by Erik Larson, “Where The Crawdads Sing” by Delia Owens, “Warlight” by Michael Ondaatje, and “Piranesi” by Susanna Clarke, for those who might be curious!).
Online Poker
Online poker is easy to dabble in and helps pass the time —recently there have been more free-to-play apps in which it’s you versus “the computer.” But if you are looking for new ways to connect socially over distance, you can give more sophisticated forms of the game a look, such as getting some friends together for a virtual game once or twice a week. Working out how to play online poker is fairly straightforward these days. It just takes a simple sign-up, and if you’re looking to play with real money you’ll need to set up your account accordingly. But if you just want to set up a game with friends through an online platform, you can be up and playing in minutes, and having a great time with your buddies in the process.
Written Letters
I have to say that written letters might be my favorite solution of all. I agree with a lot of the advantages shared in this article written fairly early on in the 2020 crisis where the author started sending handwritten letters and found it to be more fulfilling than video chat meetings. There is something special about putting your thoughts down on paper and there is a special thrill when you receive a handwritten letter in the mail. Sure, it’s old-fashioned in a way that almost feels like a gimmick in the 2020s. But when you simply aren’t around people as much and you want to tell them how you’re doing and ask what they’re up to, a letter adds a personal touch that cannot be replicated by anything else. On the phone or over Zoom, it’s all too easy to settle for responses like “same old same old,” or “not much new!” But in a written letter, people tend to do a bit more sharing, and it makes for a feeling of intimacy that can otherwise be hard to establish at a distance.
Connecting with others is always important, and has been all the more so in light of widespread isolation in the past year. Of course, we’re all looking forward to being able to socialize normally in public again, and that will certainly help. But we all have distant connections even in the best of times, and my hope is that some of the methods and strategies outlined above continue to help with those connections even in happy and healthy times.
Remember, you can change your life, one connection at a time!
